“I got an erotic yoni massage and had the best orgasm of my life.”
I have a weird relationship to tantra. I find the spiritual or new age-y side of it a bit off-putting. But people promoting tantric principles or lifestyles take sex and sexual pleasure very seriously, and because of that I can’t resist looking into it.
Masturbating while visualizing balls of energy? No thanks. Open and sexually liberated people bringing focused attention to sex? Yes, please!
Recently, my research led me to yoni massages — massages focused on the vulva and vagina.
Yoni massage or yonic massage is a type of Tantric massage that primarily focuses on the vulva and vagina, in the same way that Lingam massage focuses on the male genitalia. The massage is sometimes introduced as a method of relieving tension of the vagina.
Yoni massage allows you time to slowly explore your body in a more sensual way. It can also help women who have never had an orgasm and those who would like to achieve multiple orgasms. It can be very healing for those who have suffered sexual trauma in their past, because the approach and technique is all about giving to the woman—making her feel loved, cherished, worshiped, and honored.
The vagina is called yoni in Sanskrit and loosely translates to “a sacred space.” In Tantra philosophy, we approach the vagina from a place of the utmost love and respect. Yoni massage is a practice intended to truly honor a woman, to give her selfless pleasure, and to explore the sacred side of her sexuality.
Anorgasmia is delayed, infrequent or absent orgasms — or significantly less-intense orgasms — after sexual arousal and adequate sexual stimulation. Women who have problems with orgasms and who feel significant distress about those problems may be diagnosed with anorgasmia.
Among all women, the frequency and intensity of orgasms vary. Also, for any individual, orgasms can be different from one time to the next. The type and amount of stimulation needed to have an orgasm also varies.
Multiple factors may lead to anorgasmia. These include relationship or intimacy issues, cultural factors, physical or medical conditions, and medications. Treatments can include education about sexual stimulation, sexual enhancement devices, individual or couple therapy, and medications.
Female orgasmic disorder is another term for the spectrum of problems with orgasms. The word “anorgasmia” specifically refers to not being able to have an orgasm, but it’s also used as shorthand for female orgasmic disorders.
Often a husband shies away from making love to his pregnant wife because he believes she or the fetus could be injured. As it happens a pregnant woman’s libido is on the increase and not getting any attention in that area is not going to help her stress levels.
Masturbation as an alternative is nice but, being stimulated is much better.
It’s the dirty little secret of baby-making: After nine long months, you’re overwhelmed by the love you feel for your newborn — and shocked to find how much havoc that bundle of joy is wreaking in the bedroom. If you’re feeling less than lusty after having a baby, you’re not alone.
“It’s completely normal for both women and men’s libido to hit a rock-bottom low during the first six to nine months following the birth of your baby,”
You don’t need to throw your sex life out with the bathwater. Here are a few secrets to help you dust off your sexuality post-baby.
Focus on mindful meditation while being brought to Orgasm
For women who are not familiar, OM (orgasic meditation) is a sequenced practice in which one person gently strokes the other’s clitoris. The “stroking” allegedly activates the limbic system and releases a flood of oxytocin. Some say the result is said to be therapeutic, rather than sexual – but I say, if you are there why not go the distance.
While most of the trendy services offering OM charge hefty fees to experience and learn the Art of OM – my sessions are free of charge and no tip is required.